As always, if just one person understands or 'gets it' from my post, then I did what I set out to do. The holidays are over and a new year has begun. First, I would like to ask if you would, those who pray, please pray for those that have no where to stay as it is so cold out side and winter is rearing her head to say "I am here, ready or not!". We have so many homeless in this country today that it is sad to think that one of us could very well be the next one out there depending on how life is going in a single moment. Men, women, young and old, children that are without shelter or food. Please be in prayer that God will protect and comfort them. That He may guide them in their life and aid in their struggles each and every day. May He provide warmth and shelter from these bitter cold elements and bless them as they go on their way.
So, here I go...
As a lot of you know, I have been starting my New Year off with a trip to Asheville each January. Gathering together with others in recovery. And I must say, this year, as in the past years, I had the best time. Seeing old friends, making new friends and learning about recovery during the entire weekend. That is an event that I will try my very best to attend each year that they have it.
So, some of you also know that a few years ago, while in Asheville, I heard someone speak and they said something that I had heard before but it never registered like it did when I heard the speaker say 'the drugs aren't the problem, my way of thinking is the problem!' It is even in the literature that I read on a regular basis. So, I see that what they say in recovery is true, you get/understand things when it is time for you to get/understand things and not any sooner.
Well, this year, I heard 'just remember that the first one could be your last one!' I have never really thought about it that way. I have heard in the past year more about people that did one drug or another and it killed them! The first time they used it.. Yes, that's what I said, they died from the very first time of using drugs. Now I understand as an addict myself that we don't think of the 'bad stuff' that happens when we use. Especially if someone is in relapse mode until they use that 'first' one. Then, they say, they begin feeling the pain of the use, of knowing that you have let folks down.
But we never stop to think 'this crap could very well be the last hit I have ever taken.' So many people that I have heard over the course of 2013-2014 have shared about this one or that one that did drugs for the first time and the one that has done drugs for the umpteen time and it killed them. One hit of whatever and dead. That is a very profound thought, you know? So when I heard this again in Asheville, it made me think 'Well just what do the numbers look like where drugs are what killed someone compared to other causes of death.' Here is what I found from research on the internet:
There are more drug related deaths per year than deaths cause by traffic accidents. We have more drug related deaths in the first week of each month than in the last week of the month. It was noted that could be due to disability, SSI, and different other government checks being received at the first of each month, but no real proof to back that up with. Now my own personal experience is that folks that were on government checks, no matter which kind it is, those folks used those checks to purchase their drugs or illegal substances (street drugs).
There have been many studies done and I pulled info from several websites. Hope you don't mind but I thought I would share a few more with you. Approximately 114 die each day from related drug use. Approximately 6748 people per day are treated in ERs for misuse and abuse of drugs. The main age group that overdose on drugs are 25-64. In 2012, there were approximately 59% more males than females that died due to drug abuse and/or overdose. Whites have the highest death rate, followed by American Indians/Alaska Natives, followed by Blacks.
Also, there are approximately 23.1 million Americans that need treatment for problems related to drugs and/or alcohol use and abuse. Only about 2.4 of these Americans actually receive the help needed. And some of the websites stated that in these studies that some of the information for overdose probably was from just plain ole drug use and abuse not because of suicide.
Now, back to 'that first one' or 'just one more'. Really after reading just this small amount of information as to the high rates of deaths and overdoses that our country alone, not any other country, just our own, you still think 'one more'??
As I stated earlier, I never have even thought of 'this may be my LAST one'...not in the sense of it will kill me. Yes, I have said I'll just do one more and never ever did I think twice about just dropping dead after I got that last one and used it. I would think no addict or alcoholic has ever really thought of it as the 'last' one, the one that kills me. I truly believe that if I had really understood that my first hit could have very well been my last hit, I think I would have thought twice about what I was doing. But I didn't and I don't think anyone that is in active addiction today has ever had that thought. And if they did it was just a glance across their minds that they shook off as part of being crazy and did that hit anyway.
I guess what I really want you to hear, whether you are in active addiction, recovery, working a program or know someone that is part of these things, in that their first hit, use, smoke could very well be their last one without them ever knowing. That what they thought was going to ease the pain of life on life's terms was going to kill that pain all together along with them! I have sat and listened to folks talk about when they were using and someone that they knew and used with just did a hit of whatever drug they were using and that person, their friend, dropped dead right then and there...yes this is a very serious matter and yes I pray that all who read this and knows someone in addiction can understand just how serious this really is...!!
And let me add that just because a doctor 'prescribes' a medicine to you does not mean you take it how ever you want to. All at once, a few at a time or whatever. There are prescription drugs that addicts or anyone can use to get high. People abuse prescription medication as much as those who use 'street drugs'. There are reports that have been performed showing that prescription drugs are abused more than the 'street drugs'. So please stop telling yourself as well as others that 'oh I have a prescription for that and that doesn't count.'
A drug is a drug is a drug...alcohol is a drug! Anything that is mind altering and mood changing. Yes, I take this serious, more serious since I went to Asheville, but that's what weekends like that are for. To learn how to stop the using and learning to live life on life's terms. Getting as much recovery as possible. And if you are lucky, like I feel I have been, hearing something for 'the first time', that you have heard, read, or been told about, but this time it was 'time' for you to hear it or get it.
I know that everyone that is in recovery are not part of a 12 step program but I tell you, for me, I have to have that. I have to be able to talk and spend time with other recovering addicts. Why you may ask? So that I can learn to live life on it's terms. So I can learn new ways that my disease may come at me that I am not seeing. So I can learn about how to make good decisions, how to be a responsible member of society, how to be around other people and feel a part of instead of singled out of the crowd. No matter how long I am clean, I believe that I can learn something from other addicts that may one day save my life...
Addiction is serious. Those of us that are able to find recovery and a 12 step program should be truly grateful and strive to learn all they can to battle this disease and to help others. Please if you are in a program help someone that may be new, those that are struggling and those that appear to have a hold on things. If you are using and abusing drugs, please look to get help to stop before you kill yourself or do some type of damage to yourself and have to live with it. Stop before you kill someone else, destroy families and friendships, employment and so many other things that can happen from using.
Recovery is awesome! Especially recovery and being part of a program and group of folks that understand where I am coming from. I love and care for you all. I pray that you understand where this is coming from. That you find what you needed to get through today. Just for today, one day at a time with out the use of drugs. Remember that any addict not using is a miracle...
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