There will be things and people that I will never understand, I think. Okay, when I say that I want your comments, well I really do, especially on this post. You see I am in recovery and I understand that there are times when my thinking is not clear or on the right track. So, this is why I am putting this out there, maybe, hopefully, someone will have some sound advice to give.
Here's the thing, over the past few months (and I put everything as if it happened to me) I have been told that I am judgemental, prejudiced, closed minded and things of that nature. I don't understand! Now I know I still have some walls up. Those are there to protect myself from those that may want to do me harm, mentally and physically. Everyone in my life and people that I have just met or will meet in the future will not just automatically get close to me at first. I have to really get to know someone very well before they will ever get over a wall or two with me. This is a defect of character, I know and am working on that. Still there has to be a limit as to how close you first let someone in.
Being called judgemental and prejudiced are two things I have NEVER seen in myself. Do you see it? Please tell me how you see these two defects in me.
No, I do not agree with men wearing their pants down around their rears. I don't agree with this sticking out your tongue in every single photo of yourself. I don't agree with the idea that you sleep with someone whether you know them or not. No I don't agree with people cursing like sailors and then explaining it as 'the street part of you'. There are probably more than this but you get the picture.
Just because I don't think you should wear your pants so very low, that is your choice. The way you portray yourself in photos is your choice. I am very old fashion when it come to relationships. It may not seem that way at times but trust me, I am not someone who just does it to be doing it. Never have had that way of thinking. And no, I in no way agree with 'cursing like a sailor' from anyone especially someone in recovery. Yes, I understand that is the way of 'the streets , but your not in the streets any more, you are SUPPOSE to be in recovery. And there again, I know that I can only work my recovery and no one else's.
In my process of recovery, I have learned that I am not the same person I was when I was using. So it only seems that if you are 'no longer' that addict in 'active addiction', you should act as though you aren't. I had no respect for myself or others when I was using but I'm NOT USING, so it only seems to me that I should 'not' be doing the other things I was in active addiction, if I have stopped USING.
Any addict in recovery and truly wanting recovery, in my opinion only, should not be engaging in any activity that you were doing in your using. Now, I understand that not everyone can stop all things they were involved in when using. But you still should not have that drug mind set lifestyle. The way we present ourselves as 'recovering addicts' means more than just saying those words. We, wait, I cannot be a good example to that person in active addiction if I continue to 'live the lifestyle'! In recovery you have a different walk and a different talk.
As far as me being prejudiced, are you serious? Anyone at all that knows me knows that there is not a prejudiced bone in my body, none. I have friends of all race, religion and backgrounds. I am the type person that as long as you are honest and true to me, I am the same to you. Do my very best to live by a simple rule "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." It is my experience, that there are very few folks that live by this today. They are out for themselves, doesn't matter how it may hurt or affect someone else.
.
And finally, I saw a video on the internet that showed a young man that was just jailed in a prison and the guards were telling him he would never be able to be anything but a drug addict. Excuse me! I understand the 'scare straight' techniques, but it just broke my heart and made me so angry at the same time. People need to know that someone that has a drug addiction does not necessarily mean that you will not 'amount to anything'. This is why I do this blog, just trying to educate one person that there is a better way, you do not have to use drugs. You can stop and become a productive member of society. We addicts, will always be addicts, it is a disease that has no cure but it can be arrested.
As I stated at the first of this post, please leave your comments. I would really love to know if there are others out there that feel the same. If you don't feel the same, I would love to know why, please explain your viewpoint. No, not all addicts get clean and learn to live life without the use of drugs. People are not going to stop being prejudiced. Folks are still going to think their way is the correct way no matter what anyone may say.
In a nutshell, I believe in being myself. Sorry if that is not 'politically correct'. People that know me know that I have no worries in not being 'politically correct'. I feel that I try to follow my heart and do what I feel God wants me to do. Yes, I am a Christian as well as being a recovering addict. Life does not have to stop just because of an addiction or some other type of limitation. Everyone has the right to their own life and the way they want to live as long as it does not harm others. Do the next right thing for the right reason. I am bull headed at times, will not listen to reason, and at times I go head strong into something that I truly believe in and nothing anyone can say or do can change my mind. I will not be bullied. Things that I believe in or against will be things that I will make my stand for or against. I am a person that takes my public and private positions seriously. Again, sorry if that is not 'politically correct'. Being my own person is very important to me. Hope that I didn't step on too many toes in this but y'all know me, telling it like it is...
No comments:
Post a Comment