Defined as putting up with pain or trouble without complaint; capable of calmly awaiting an outcome or results, not hasty or impulsive; showing self-control; calm, steadfast.
It has been my experience that patience is needed in almost all, if not all, areas of one's life. Patience is a principle that we all must learn to some degree in our life. So let's get started and look at 'patience' and how I must practice this principle whether I want to or not!
Now, in active addition, you cannot find many that have patience or practices this principle. Addict or not most of us have a hard time being patient. I have had to learn a lot about having patience since entering into recovery. There was really no patience in active addiction. I wanted what I wanted, when I wanted it and how I wanted it! I thought the world revolved around me and what I wanted.
When I got to the rough and raw part of my addiction, I had the mind set that I would get what I wanted anytime I wanted. I would get extremely upset when I could not use because of outside issues: no money, they were out, no way to get there and so on. At this point in my addiction I really believe that I could not stop using even though I wanted so desperately to stop.
Trying to get into recovery can be a difficult task. Why? I have no idea! But as I have shared before, it took a few days for me to get into the treatment facility. It breaks my heart to see and know people that so want help and not being able to receive it in a timely manner. Partly due to the "I want it when I want it..." and so on. Then partly because it is so expensive. If you are lucky enough to get into a facility that charges on a sliding scale and it's some place you can deal with, you feel safe, then take it. I, myself, was able to get into a state funded facility. Fortunately, I was accepted immediately into the treatment facility that I felt would do me the most good. Thank God I have been able to pay that debt in full. For I know, had I not paid that balance in full, should I relapse, I could not go back there. Today, I can breath a small sigh of relief, that if need be I can go back.
After getting into this treatment center, I had to wait on this or that to take place in the order they were suppose to happen. It was hard at first. God has really tested my patience since that day or before that day. He has lead me in a path that I am comfortable being in. In treatment, the process of learning patience started. I, also, was able to learn that I should have patience in all areas of my life. It may not be a piece of cake, but I know that I must just sit back and let whatever process is working, work. I can't try to put my spin on it. God is handling it and showing me what to do.
There is this saying 'Patience is a virtue'. I have never thought about what that really means. So, I looked it up on Google. This is what I found that seems to fit best, when we say 'Patience is a virtue' we are exposing our moral values and expressing the importance of patience as a foundation of principle. Patience is a necessity for a happy existence and that is why the phrase is so often used. There are several issues that I am waiting on the outcome of before I can move ahead. To me, being patience is sitting still. Letting go and letting God. Meaning I do my very best to keep my hands off, so as not to manipulate the out come in anyway. That is how I look at having patience. As long as I let the process that must take place, in order for me to get to the other side, run its natural course, keeping my hands off, that is patience.
This is not a complex principle, it is a difficult principle for most folks. I think, to be able to just sit still and not do anything is very hard, especially if you know something that you can do to tip the scales in your favor. I must trust that God has the wheel on whatever the situation may be and He will work it the way it should go. Good, bad, or indifferent.
Being impatience is part of my disease. I want what I want when and how I want it. Doesnt' matter what I have to do to get it: steal, lie, manipulate, and the list goes on. Today, as I stated I choose not to do anything except have the patience needed and the trust in God needed to move forward in my life. I also believe that patience and tolerance go far in explaining how they should work together for the common good.
Each day, each morning that God allows me to wake up, is a very gratifying gift. When issues work themselves out, the meaning of patience comes flowing in. There are times that I can only sit still and wait and watch in order not to lose sight of what is really behind the questions that I have. Putting all,,every single ounce of yourself, myself on hold and keeping our hands off.
Once you start trying to practice the principle in all areas of your life that need it, you will see just how strong and powerful being patient can help and even change your/my outlook on things. No matter what the situation is about. Not putting my hands on every little thing, trusting God is working on that problem and I really believe He is, all things will work out the way they should. It may not be to my liking but that;s okay too.
There are folks that, if you have any patience at all, think that you are stuck and not moving forward. You can and will probably get stuck from time to time, but being patient, sitting still while the process is working is not being stuck or complacent. You are just doing what is needed at that time.
Again, this is not the easiest principle to adhere to. Being an addict, I feel, makes it much harder to practice patience. There will be some that just can't do it no matter how hard they try. Some people are just 'wired' differently and it is very hard, if not impossible for them to have patience.
So, I have shared my experience so far, on hope, surrender, acceptance, honesty, open mindedness, willingness, faith, tolerance and patience. As stated, when you can learn how to apply each one in your life, your life can and will change. The more areas you apply these principle to, the more change you will see or you can have. If you did not read all these principles that I have shared, please feel free to go back and read them. I think you will see that going back is well worth the time. The next principles will be humility, empathy, trust, commitment and others. If you are like me, an addict, some of these principles are not quiet what I thought they were. Like humility, it might have a different meaning than what you think. I did not realize just how hard it was going to be to apply and practice these principles in my life.
Hope you have enjoyed and maybe found some helpful things in the past posts. In the process of doing this blog, my hope is that someone, addict or not, can get some help they so desperately seek. My goal is to post helpful information. My experiences in active addiction and recovery are shared to help that person to understand they are not the only ones that feel this way, act that way, you are not alone. Also, my hope is to raise awareness to the ever growing problem of addiction. It is running at full speed ahead and help and understanding is in great demand.
If you are an addict looking for help, please go to my resource page. There is a lot of helpful information there. If, for some reason, you do not find what you are looking for, send me an email as to what you need or are trying to find and I will do my best to help you or put you in contact with someone that can help. I really do love each and everyone of you and you are appreciated more that you will ever know. Thank you for the encouragement you have given to me by just reading my post. God bless.
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